I was driving home yesterday and a song came on the radio called “That’s My Job” by Conway Twitty. It’s an older song, but you know how KVET likes to spin the country classics. Anyway, as I was listening to the song I felt as if God was speaking to me through the words of the song, which I will share with you…
“I woke up crying late at night when I was very young.
I had dreamed my father had passed away and gone.My world revolved around him and I couldn’t lay there anymore.
So I made my way down the mirrored hall and tapped upon his door.And I said “Daddy, I’m so afraid how will I go on with you gone that way?
Don’t wanna cry anymore so may I stay with you?”And he said “That’s my job, that’s what I do.
Everything I do is because of you, to keep you safe with me.
That’s my job you see.”
As I was listening to those words, I began to realize how selfish I am as a parent. So often I find myself feeling annoyed when Allison isn’t cooperating with my plans for the moment. Whether it’s the change in lifestyle that keeps me from dinners out and movies as often as I would like or having to work my daily schedule and meetings around her, or when she comes in and needs her Daddy’s attention when I am trying to get some work done, I just continue to see how selfish I am.
The truth that I felt like God was sharing with me yesterday is that being Allison’s Daddy is one of the most important jobs I will ever have. It’s one of the biggest blessings, responsibilities, challenges and opportunities I will ever receive. It’s my job… it’s what I do. It should be on my business card and my email signature. Much like my parents eventually became less known as Joe and Kay and more as Jon and Michael’s parents, so shall it be with me. And that is a great thing. Like any job, there will be good days and tough days… days I love my job and days that it will stretch me to the limit. But all in all, what an incredible job to be entrusted with, and one that I must put my whole heart into, whether I feel like it at the moment or not. Allison and any future children that God blesses Corissa and I with are our jobs – not a daycare’s, not some teacher’s, not the government’s, but ours. They will be ours to love, to protect, to nurture, to guide and to raise. We will be responsible for teaching them manners, good decision making, discipline and most importantly, introducing them to God… there is no one else that can do it for us, nor should there be. No paying job I will ever have will be more important than this one.
That revelation was tested almost immediately last night when Allison woke up at about 1:30 this morning scared to death about something. Maybe she was reliving her choking episode from earlier in the day or something, I don’t know. But whatever it was, I was up with her until 5am… and as I was there comforting whatever it was that had her so scared, I just kept hearing those words from the afternoon… that’s my job, that’s what I do. As I sat there thinking I should just let her cry and deal with it while I sleep, I remembered that there were days when I was young that I was scared and needed comforting. That there was a job that God had given me that was never promised to be easy that I was being called to answer to at that moment. And so, instead of being ticked off that I was losing sleep, God changed my attitude and I actually started to appreciate the moment… to pray for her, my family, my shortcomings as a father – which are more plentiful than I would like to admit – and to consider just what a blessing being a parent is, even when it’s not easy.
I don’t share this with you in any way to toot a horn for myself, and I truly hope it isn’t taken as such… any shift in my perspective is credit to God, not to me. But I share it with you because I know that so many of us are sharing similar experiences right now – whether it is the challenge of parenthood or preparing for it through morning sickness or what have you. And as I was praying and thinking there in Allison’s room last night, it just felt like God was prompting me to pass this on. So, if that’s the case, I hope that God will speak to you through this… it not, please forgive my rambling.
Jon
Allison’s Daddy
